I hate when I start getting depressed. For a naturally optimistic person, becoming sad or depressed is like having your whole world flipped upside-down, and it’s one of the few times I become pessimistic. I don’t even know why I’m writing this at 1:15 in the morning, with the only source of light being that of my laptop, so that I can barely see the damned keys that I’m typing on. Luckily I have music to help me out. It really is fucking brilliant. I’m listening to an instrumental version of “Africa” by Toto, as covered by the Hackney Colliery Band. It’s a lot jumpier and has a nice brass section to it. It almost has the feeling of Ska music, which I always found to be agreeable to my ears. I know this doesn’t make sense, and it’s all over the place, but I don’t care at the moment. Oh, one thing I’ve noticed that happens when I’m upset, sad, or depressed is that I get a lot meaner. I also become very impatient and rude. What I hate though is that tightening in my throat, like you have a lump in your throat that won’t go away. It pisses me off even more because on top of being sad, my neck also just hurts….fucking prick of a neck. What does seem to help is switching playlists on stereomood to different moods. That seems to bring me up out of it, if only just a bit. Do you know what? I think I’m gonna post this. I figure I might as well. I don’t post enough of me just saying shit. Oh my God, my girlfriend makes puns every time I say the word shit or poop or anything like that. They are terrible jokes and I want them to stop. I have told her so, but she laughed and now I think she intends to do them more. This is what I get for dating people that are like me. I think that’s about all I have in me for now. Yeah, that’s gonna just about do it. Peace.
